


I'll regret this chat

by Randomarmyreveluv



Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: 1st fanfiction, Alternate Universe - College/University, Crack, F/F, Fanfiction, OT5 Friendship, Probably will be total cringe, This will probably be bad, Whipped Wendy, i was bored, i will add more tags
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-26
Updated: 2018-05-28
Packaged: 2019-05-13 21:45:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14756873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Randomarmyreveluv/pseuds/Randomarmyreveluv
Summary: SquirtleCultleader: TODAY HISTORY WAS MADEBaechu: Did you finally stop cussing for more then 0.82379 seconds?Helpmysoul: Did u finally stop being a piece of shitPringlesareheavenonearth: Did u finally stap watching lesbian porn so loudly that i can hear u nxt door





	1. The start of it all

**Author's Note:**

> This sucks please forgive me.
> 
> Baechu - Irene
> 
> Pringlesareheavenonearth - Seulgi
> 
> Helpmysoul - Wendy
> 
> Ineedcoffee - Joy
> 
> SquirtleCultleader - Yeri

My Girls ◕‿◕

 

Baechu added SquirtleCultleader,Ineedcoffee,Helpmysoul,& Pringlesareheavenonearth to this chat.

 

Baechu: Hello my children(*~▽~)

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: Hello~ c:

 

Ineedcoffee: I can’t believe my binge watching session with yeri was interrupted for this shit

 

Baechu: How dare you be so rude! Especially to your mother!

 

Ineedcoffee: The sole idea of you as my mom is enough to launch me to my unavoidable death

 

Baechu: I thought I raised you better than this.

 

SquirtleCultleader: you’ve only been around for about 3 years of her life u walnut

 

Baechu: I should’ve never let you around Joy she’s turned you into a monster.

 

Helpmysoul: You’ve barely raised us u rlly just try to act motherly cause you’ll never be ready for a real kid Irene unnie I'd say you've raised us about as well as u raised that one potted plant that died within a week like my motivation

 

Baechu: Why are my children attacking me so suddenly?

 

Ineedcoffee: Irene rn:

  
  


Helpmysoul: Also u couldn’t bake anything until I taught u after bout 7 batches of burnt cookies

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: I hate to say this but Wendy is right on this 1

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: Those cookies were as black as Yeri says her soul is

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: U still make the best Bibimbap though

 

Helpmysoul: Ur so precious c:

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: Aww ty

 

Ineedcoffee: 110% whipped

 

Helpmysoul: And u wonder why I look at you as if ur my worst enemy every time I see u Park Sooyoung  
  


SquirtleCultleader: Going back to irene interrupting my binge-watching session if you do that again I have something special in store :)

 

Baechu: What did I do the deserve this treatment

 

Ineedcoffee: Exist. 

 

SquirtleCultleader: I was watching yuri on ice with Joy unnie and it was getting rlly good and when u interrupt such a thing ya can’t put it past my ass to not murder u in ur sleep

 

Baechu:⊂•⊃_⊂•⊃

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: why are u always watching anime gayer then the force of every fandom combined

 

SquirtleCultleader: Because it’s better than talking to u guys

 

Helpmysoul: I'm interested please spill this tea 

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: So i busted into Yeri's flat because I left my textbook there and you'll never guess what I found

 

Baechu: what did u find

 

 Pringlesareheavenonearth: I found Yeri watching High School DxD

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: For those of you unedcated about this type of anime high school dxd has many very gay boob related moments which is probaloy why Yeri was watching it 

 

Ineedcoffee: I mean is this really suprising 

 

Helpmysoul: tbh not rlly

 

SquirtleCultleader: You'll pay for this Kang Seulgi

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: Crap she pulled out the proper grammar card

 

Ineedcoffee: dont forget the full name

 

Ineedcoffee: well seulgi i advize you to keep up ur guard because yeri is unperdictable af

 

Baechu changed " _SquirtleCultleader_ " to " _Disappointment_ " 

 

Helpmysoul: Why am I friends with yall

 

Ineedcoffee: Cause you wouldnt find friends anywhere else

 

Helpmysoul: Sadly true…

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: Why do I suddenly feel like I'm being watched

 

 _Disappointment_ has logged off

 

Helpmysoul: want me to come over? we can watch movies I'll bring the ice cream

 

 Pringlesareheavenonearth: i have the pringles

 

Ineedcoffee: As whipped as ever 

 

  
Baechu:My children….we need to have a talk.


	2. Regret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seulgi screws up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My new goals are to do a chapter every week and have at least 1,000 words per chapter

 

Disappointment: TODAY HISTORY WAS MADE

 

Baechu: Did you finally stop cussing for more then 0.82379 seconds?

 

Helpmysoul: Did u finally stop being a piece of shit

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: Did u finally stap watching lesbian porn so loudly that i can hear u nxt door

 

Ineedcoffee: Oh shit ya just got exposed

 

Helpmysoul: ThE TEA HAs BEn Spilled UPon the saCrED GROUnds

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth:

 

Baechu: Yeri. I’m so disappointed in you. Did I raise you for it to come to this?

 

SquirtleCultleader: SEULGI YOU MOTHERFUKER YOU ASSWIPE I AM COMING FOR U AND UR PRINGLES

 

Baechu: JOY STOP HERRRRRRRR

 

Ineedcoffee: I TRIED BUT SHES TO STrONG

 

Ineedcoffee: RIP Kang Seulgi you will be missed

 

Helpmysoul:NOOO SEULGI MY BABBYYYYjfdvsknvs

 

Ineedcoffee: Still as whipped as ever

 

Helpmysoul: NOw is noT thE tIme

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: Oh shoot

 

Helpmysoul: What happened

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: I’m at the campus’s cafe drinking a mocha fap and suddenly I hear yeri screaming “KANG SEULGI” at the top of her lungs while running at me with murder in her bloodshot eyes

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: Now everyone is looking at me and I’m running away while keeping ur asses updating

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: Yeri wasted my beautiful frapp I’m sad :c

 

Ineedcoffee: U SHOULDN”T BE WORRYING ABouT FAPS yoU NEDed To WORry AbOUT Yeri

 

Pringlesareheavenonearth: I feel bad cause I knocked over everything while running away

 

Helpmysoul: My precious teddy bear u there is still hope TODAY U WILL SURVIVE

 

Ineedcoffee: There is still hope my ass lmao when yeri is angry she’s VERY SCARY

 

Baechu: Aww look at my precious children ^ u ^

 

Ineedcoffee: “Precious” they say

 

Helpmysoul: Seulgi? U still there bear?

 

Helpmysoul: Seulgi usually never replys later than 5 min

 

Ineedcoffee: Shit do u think Yeri got her

 

Baechu: Thats likely since Seulgi is basically a turtle in terms of speed

 

Baechu: Its 11pm now and i need sleep so if Seulgi doesn’t come back by tomorrow we can assume yeri killed her

 

Helpmysoul: I rlly just hope she’s ok

 

Helpmysoul:I was going to bring her sticky rice cakes topped with pringles tomarrow

 

Baechu: wth

 

Helpmysoul: Seulgi’s idea

 

Helpmysoul: In her own words “Pringles are like oxegen Wendy I NEED THEM TO LIVE”

 

Helpmysoul: Also she screamed so fuckin loudly when she discovered the recipe and shoved it into my face

 

Ineedcoffee: Knowing Seulgi why are u suprised irene

 

 

* * *

 

THE NEXT GLORIOUS DAY

Helpmysoul created [SEULGI IS GONE]

Helpmysoul added Baechu & Ineedcoffee

 

Helpmysoul: OK YOU FUCKERS _ASS_ EMBLE CODE RED CODE RED COOdee REd

 

Ineedcoffee: wtf do u want i cant functon i havent had coffe

 

Helpmysoul: Did u already forget u dumbass

 

Baechu: Wow usually Wendy is a lot nicer but she’s very defensive when it come to her “Teddy bear”

 

Helpmysoul: stfu

 

Helpmysoul: BEFORE I WAS RUDELY INTERUPPETED BY A CERTAIN BITCH WE WERE GOING TO TALK BOUT SEULGI

 

Ineedcoffee: Oh yeah her

 

Helpmysoul: SHE HASN”T COME BACK AND I EVEN BUSTED INTO HER DORM TODAY

 

Helpmysoul: And on a side note her room looks so _soft_ she needs to be protected

 

Baechu: So Yeri must have taken her

 

Ineedcoffee: Oh shit

* * *

 

“ Yeri I hate you,” Seulgi groaned lips turning into a pout.

 

“Well if you don’t want me to vandalize your dorm this is the deal,” Yeri replied unfazed.

 

Seulgi still remembered the last time she screwed up with Yeri and that time Yeri said she would “spare her”. She thought she wouldn’t do anything drastic if Seulgi pissed her off again but oh how wrong she was.

 

After Yeri had chased her across half of the campus and caught her once she ran out of breath she dragged a screaming Seulgi back to her dorm to do her bidding.

 

Her bidding, in particular, was forcing Seulgi to be her personal maid for a whole 24 hours. Since Yeri _always_ kept her word the point that it was scary she knew if she didn’t do this she was going to be a goner. Not to mention the malicious look in her eyes as she caught her.

 

“I finished making your Kimchi fried rice,” Seulgi said coldly.

 

“Thank you!” Yeri replied cheerfully, “Now I want you to sext Wendy for me, ok?”

 

Seulgi turned around and stared her dead in the eye. Yeri had forced her multiple times throughout the night to do embarrassing things that made her die inside including:

 

  1. Forcing her to scream about dicks.
  2. Forcing her to slap random strangers that stared at her.
  3. Forcing her to get herself banned from as many places near campus as possible.
  4. Basically doing everything she could within 24 hours to make Seulgi embarrassed because that is her idea of “fun”



 

Thank the heavens a certain someone arrived at that moment.

 

“KIM YERIM IF YOU DON’T OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW YOU’LL NEVER SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY AGAIN!”

 

Thank the heavens that Wendy was born on this planet to save her.

 

Yeri dropped her rice and let a series of curses.

 

Of course, her evil smile quickly appeared on her face as she shouted back “Sorry! Can’t right now I’m to busy forcing Seulgi to tell me _all_ your secrets so I can blackmail you!”

 

Cue a banshee scream here.

 

Of course, Yeri would want to make the situation worse and trick poor Wendy like this.

 

Of course, her evil ass would say that.

 

Cue the facepalm.

 

Suddenly a loud noise interrupted the brief silence as the door fell onto the floor.

 

“Oh man holy shit,” Yeri said, eyes wide.

 

“Hello Kim Yerim, you will pay for this,” Wendy said calmly a container of Pringle sticky rice cakes clutched in her hands.

Wendy walked in grabbed Seulgi’s wrist and took her out of there.

 

Helpmysoul changed [SEULGI IS GONE] to [I found Seulgi]

 

Helpmysoul: I found her.

 

Ineedcoffee: What did you do to her?

 

Helpmysoul: Who?

 

Ineedcoffee: Wendy don’t play dumb dumb Yeri just called me and she sounds shook af

 

_Helpmysoul has logged off_

 

Baechu: Bitch I’m scared.

 

Baechu: What did she do to poor Yeri

 

Ineedcoffee: Idk but Yeri just sent me this selca with the caption “Help me”

 

Baechu: Well fuck.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TEA HAS BEEN SPILLED! Thank you LeaderBae and whoever that guest is btw for leaving kudos it means so much. I've always wanted an RV chat fic so I decided to make one myself. This fic is basically me trying to be funny.

**Author's Note:**

> Save me  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZjt_sA2eso


End file.
